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Persona 4: Alternative Medicine
[P4] don't ever leave me.
chisotahn wrote in ikuzeaibou
Title: Alternative Medicine
Fandom: Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 4
Characters: Souji/Yosuke
Summary: Sometimes, you don't realize how much you need someone until you nearly lose them. Self-indulgent fluff time, go!

Notes: Hey, look. I wrote a thing. It's been a long time... even the short fic I posted at Christmas was technically written in 2009. But, thanks to Persona 4 Arena (and a few other things) reminding me how much I adore these characters, I'm writing again. A cute piece of fanart prompted this little bit of fluff.

As always, credit is due to Frigoris for her mad beta skillz and all her encouragement - and a special bonus shout-out for Akisazame, who kept poking and poking me until I finally wrote a thing! Thanks, guys. ♥

Spoilers: No actual plot spoilers whatsoever!

It's fine. Everything's going to be okay - Souji's going to be okay. Yosuke sighs and slumps against the wall, closing his eyes and trying to feel less like a giant ball of exhaustion and nerves and more like a functional human being. It's not really working, though. Visiting hours are just about over; Dojima and Nanako have already left, and he can hear the rest of the team filing out of the hospital room, whispering among themselves. He opens his eyes just enough as Yukiko touches his shoulder; she nods at him, understanding somehow. And then he's alone, sort of, just him and Souji and the nurse and random beeping, booping machines that don't help with the calming down part of the equation.

The nurse gives him a long look. "Five more minutes, then out," she informs him as she walks by, heading for the nurse's station at the end of the hall.

Yosuke doesn't move for at least one of those five minutes - then, finally, he pushes himself upright and takes the few steps to the side of Souji's bed. The Shadow-inflicted bruises are livid on his arms, but he's breathing fine, the monitors are just there for formality's sake, really. It's fine. He's going to be fine. "Don't... don't scare me like that, partner," he mutters under his breath, tugging the room's single chair over before sinking into it. The scene is still replaying in his brain, Shadows lunging and twisting, over and over. He can distantly hear the squeak of his soles on the floor, moving just a little too late to take the hit, and Souji crumpling to the ground under the Shadow's blow. Sure, Chie followed up with a vicious kick that would've dented a car, but the fact remains: they let him take that hit. They're why Souji's here now.

He's why Souji's here now.

"Just... don't," he whispers, leaning towards Souji, then burying his head in his hands. He would've taken this so much better if he'd been the one in the bed, because that's what he's for... more or less. "I don't want to... I dunno, lose you, or something," and there's a stupid damn lump in his throat and his voice cracks on you and thank god there isn't anyone else in here to hear this stupid display of stupid crap. And Souji's out, so he won't hear it either.

Slowly, hardly aware of what he's doing, or of any other thought besides the ache of potential, barely-avoided loss, Yosuke leans those last few inches and brushes his lips against Souji's, just barely. And it's stupid, he knows it's stupid, but somehow the gesture rolls up every bit of guilt and longing and fear he has and pushes it all away, just for a moment.

And it would've been quick, and hopefully forgotten as he hurried out of the room, if Yosuke hadn't drawn back and seen those fucking grey eyes open and staring at him.



The chair clatters over backwards. "Souji, I - fuck, I didn't..." Now Yosuke really wishes he was the one that had taken that hit, because then maybe he would've died and if he were dead he wouldn't be here right now, with his best friend staring at him because he just kissed him what the fuck. "Just... just forget it. That... that didn't happen, okay - shit-" The bleeping and booping of the machines sounds abnormally loud, as does the pounding of his heart, but for some reason he doesn't run out the door and book it for the end of the hallway. Instead, he just stares in mounting horror as Souji slowly sits up, wincing. "Partner-"

Souji looks out of it, but the look in his eyes is surprisingly - painfully - lucid. "Yosuke, did you just..." He pauses for a moment, long enough for Yosuke to take a step backwards. "Did you just kiss me?"

Fuck. For a moment, Yosuke considers lying - surely people have dreamed stupider things, after getting smacked around like Souji did. But... but he can't, god damnit, even though it'd be easier. "Y-yeah," he mumbles, feeling his face burn crimson. "But it's nothing - stupid, just forget it, seriously. Just... sorry, I-"

"That's what I thought," Souji says, quietly; it's not the reaction Yosuke was expecting, his words spluttering into silence. "Wasn't sure, but... you're kind of a dead giveaway." When his eyes open again, there's a wry humor there, enough that Yosuke can't help but feel bizarrely relieved - whatever else happens, at least he hasn't just lost his best friend.

Then Souji takes a deep breath. "Do it again?"

"... What?!" No way did he just hear that. Not in a million years.

There's a faint smile on Souji's lips, and the faintest tinge of warmth in his pale cheeks. "I've been kind of... hoping you might be interested. I just wasn't expecting you to make the first move. And I was hoping to be conscious for it, honestly."

"... Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." Yosuke stares for a moment longer before his brain kicks into panic overdrive. "I wasn't making a move! You were unconscious!" Shit, that's worse. "That's not what I meant!"



"Seriously, it's okay."

Hesitantly, Yosuke creeps back over to the bed; he reaches out one hand tentatively, as if Souji might bite him. When nothing happens other than a deepening of his best friend's smile, he slowly touches Souji's shoulder. "You... you sure?" he whispers, just barely audible.

"Yeah. Really sure."

"... Fine. Stupid," Yosuke mumbles, and bends down again. He's expecting something like before, a soft brush of lips, so he makes a startled noise when Souji rises to meet him. The kiss is warm and surprisingly sweet, sending a not at all unpleasant jolt down Yosuke's spine, and he laughs shakily when they finally part. "I, uh... yeah..." He shifts, perching awkwardly on the edge of the bed. "Um."

"Yeah... I know what you mean," Souji says, after a moment, and his wry grin breaks the tension. "Yosuke, I-"

A sharp rap on the door cuts him off; instantly, Yosuke tenses, drawing away a little - but Souji reaches out and grabs his hand, squeezing tightly and letting go just as the door swings open. "That's enough visiting for today," the nurse says, firmly. "You need your rest," she adds, looking at Souji.

Souji nods. "I will, thanks. Yosuke..." He pauses, as if searching for words, then just shrugs and grins. "See you tomorrow?"

"Oh, yeah, sure," Yosuke stammers, then returns the smile, standing up and rubbing the back of his neck self-consciously. "Tomorrow. No problem, partner." The nurse moves in as he backs away, and he hovers in the doorway uncertainly before slipping out. Once out in the hallway, he slumps against the wall. Did that just...?

Yeah. It did.


He grins to himself as he pushes off the wall and heads out. He's not entirely sure about this, or about where things will go from here, but one thing is certain:

Tomorrow can't come soon enough.


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